Our first Forum Game! Complete the story.

So, it seemed to at least spark a positive response when I asked, so here's the first of one-day-hopefully many games. Obviously, I welcome anyone else to start another; it'd look silly if I started them all, now wouldn't it?

Complete the story! Ground rules are basically as follows: I'm going to start a story. Anyone who wants can then pick it up from where I (or the next person, or the next, etc) left off (typically, mid sentence). Story ends when... there's no longer interest in it.

Don't double post; if the thread dies, it dies.

Let's begin!



It was a calm, ordinary afternoon; nothing really all that interesting or fantastic about it. At least, that's what the boy thought as he sat at his desk. Little did he know that...

because of his curse, it started raining pickles. The neighbors, however, didn't like pickles very much, so...

they bought a sloth, named him Llewellyn, and trained him to roam the village, collecting said pickles and selling them at the market. But then..

Big Pickle got word of it and sent lobbyists to Washington to introduce legislation to stop this free pickle collection they had heard so much about. When the lobbyists arrived, they...

Discovered they made a wrong turn and had ended up in Washington state! Naturally the Washingtonians were not happy about this and they...

promptly prodded them with pine needles until they were forced to escape into the horrifying lands of British Columbia, where they resulted to...

the cruel Saltan of Suave soaked his sweat-covered sword in a soupy syrum of soap, preparing to kill the sloth that had gained so much attention. You see, the Saltan LOVED alliteration, but HATED sloths, so much so that...

he had ordered the citizens of Azerbaijan not to shower, in hopes of having the intense stench drive away any approaching sloths. When this didn't work, he..

grew FURIOUS with the ineptitude of his people. He called a meeting of all Azerbaijanis in his living room for a family talk, and told them how disppointed he was. They were all forced to...

Build a robotic mammoth squirrel (which, as we all know, is the mortal enemy of the sloth.) The robotic mammoth squirrel...

began his death march towards the suburbs, searching for Llewellyn the Pickle Hoarder, as the masses had come to refer to the sloth. The market seemed a logical first stop, but upon arrival...

A man in a green robe, pointy green hat, and a large shield on his back asked, "have you seen three gold triangles? I could've swore I left them in a pickle jar..." The robot mammoth squirrel responded...

"Mecha-Godsquirrela no like talking pickle man! Mecha-SMASH!" It squished poor pickle man and continued on its journey...

through the town. The streets were packed, but nary a sloth was to be seen. This angered the mechanical beast, who then..

decided that sloths weren't important to this storyline anyways. So he marched to the Lord Fatquantasis's mansion where he was greeted by...

A SLOTH! It turns out they were VERY important to the story, and he was insulted by the mechanical giant's nonchalant attitude about his proud race. You see, this was no ordinary sloth! This was...

actually not a sloth as they are NOT important to the story in the slightest! Carrying on, the mechanical beast found a magic lamp. After rubbing it with its muscular trunk, a genie appeared, offering 2 and a half wishes. The mechanical giant...

wished for his deepest desire: to become a sloth who was important to this story. The genie transformed the mecha-thing into none other than Llewellyn, as genies love tricking you with your wishes, before sending him back in time to create a paradox. The genie, satisfied with his work,...

scrolled up to the top of a forum page to figure out who "Llewellyn" even was. Realizing it was a sloth, he immediately recognized his mistake. You see, the genie had confused Llewellyn the sloth with Lleweelyn the dolphin, so he quickly corrected his magic. The beast, now Lleweelyn, resulted to...

swim to the lost dolphin city of Atlantis. He had decided to visit the underwater zoo to see the underwater sloths, his favorite animal. "I wonder how long the powers of the universe are going to argue about this sloth business..." he mused to himself while...

he headed off to bed. For the next 8 hours he slept. BUT SUDDENLY he woke up for no reason. Then ALL OF A SUDDEN he walked back to the zoo. Due to the lack of interesting events in this post, the sloth he had seen the previous day had disappeared! The now-dolphin knew what he had to do. And that is to...

ROCK. He swam as rockingly as he could to the deepest unhallowed black heath of Solomor, kissed with hoarfrost from the frozen heart of blackest murder to retrieve his axe, that doubled not only as a guitar, but TRIPPLED as a sitar. It was quite the instrument/tool of war. He decided to organize...

not an attack against sloths, (due to their lack of importance) but an attack against Ireland. First, he Googled "sitar" as he had a lack of knowledge in the Hindu instrument category. Then, axe/guitar/sitar in hand, he boarded the earliest Delta flight to Ireland. After passing through security with no checked luggage, he boarded the plane. A flight attendent asked him to place his instrument/tool under the seat in front of him or in the overhead compartment. He grew angry and refused, but they carried on. Upon arrival...

Edited due to 6am spelling errors.